I have this issue too often in my relationship , it’s pitiful actually . We argue about the dumbest things. I’m a student and I can ask something as simple as will you be able to get him everyday of this week… Kaboom! It becomes a argument. Is it wrong if I ask this question on his birthday? Is it bad in between bottle making , diaper changing, and constant jogging back and forth saying “no don’t touch that” I forgot his birthday was today?
Okay well allow me to explain. I have a son . Our son lives with me. While I attend school he takes him or comes here. We tried this system before and I ended up missing every monday of every damn week, and those hours add up. So I went to my Director of Education to check my hours. I was behind 100+ hours. Now, the school I go to it wouldn’t kill me to behind but if financial doesn’t cover my hours that need to be made up I end up having to pay for it by the hour. That’s a huge concern but that isn’t the main problem . I would really love my own place and to have a career to keep bills and living expenses afloat this license will do just that. I instead of him owning up to the fact that every monday he flakes to have fun with friends he says “I’m trying . You want me to be perfect and I’m trying my best. I just wish you would tell me how good of a boyfriend I am and not complain especially on my birthday”. Now I do admit I was wrong for bringing it up on this day but damn I can’t help it if I lost track of the days , and besides all I said was ” will you be able to watch Ju while I go to school starting Dec. 8th ” next thing you know he’s upset and wants to argue. He says that I need to look in the mirror and that I never want to hear what he has to say about me . No! I listen but you like to talk and hear yourself talk on top of that. No sir . I don’t want to listen to the same record play all the time. His problem is he doesn’t want to own up to what he does wrong and instead of doing so he takes the attention off his problem and tries to shine the spotlight on me. I have no issues really okay yes I’m a female and I tend to complain sometimes but look its for the best. I want my license. That is all I want. He doesn’t understand that. I have no clue how to fix this problem with us. Sometimes I question whether we need to just split ways because he is a brick wall. Nothings gets through to him and he doesn’t own up to anything. However, I do love him and I’m willing to fix this.
What would you say to him on this problem ?
Is he right, is he wrong?
Do you know any communication techniques that can help make this blame game come to an end?